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Author: Lauren Kozlowski Publisher: Escape the Narcissist ISBN: Category : Family & Relationships Languages : en Pages : 59
Book Description
'If your relationship is so bad, why don't you just leave them?' 'If you were in such an abusive relationship, why did you stay with them for so long?' 'If you knew you were in a relationship with such a toxic person, why didn't you ask people for help?' If you've ever been asked these questions, aside from being ignorant and hurtful, you'll know it's beyond frustrating. The answer to the above questions, whilst it's complex and often confusing, can be given with two words: trauma bonded. If you find you're in a relationship that you know is so toxic that it's crushing your very being, but you can't bring yourself to leave, you may be in the clutches of a tight trauma bond. If you're constantly feeling on edge, forever working to appease your spouse to little avail and like you're constantly being chipped away at with their abusive behavior, then I can understand how emotionally shattering it feels to live this way. If in the same breath, it breaks your heart to even consider leaving them because you can't imagine life without them, then I can understand that feeling too; because I was trauma bonded to my abusive ex. From my own personal experience and from the experiences other survivors have opened up to me about, this book will cover the following: - What trauma bonding really is - The 7 stages that lead to you becoming trauma bonded - The parallels that Stockholm syndrome has with trauma bonding - The 5 stages you go through when you come to accept you're trauma bonded - The cognitive dissonance a trauma bond can cause - Breaking free from the traumatic bond This book will also include my own experiences and I'll draw upon those to help you really understand trauma bonding, and let you know that you're not alone in being shackled by this emotionally crippling bond. More importantly, this book will help you understand that the invisible chain that tethers you to your abuser can be broken.
Author: Lauren Kozlowski Publisher: Escape the Narcissist ISBN: Category : Family & Relationships Languages : en Pages : 59
Book Description
'If your relationship is so bad, why don't you just leave them?' 'If you were in such an abusive relationship, why did you stay with them for so long?' 'If you knew you were in a relationship with such a toxic person, why didn't you ask people for help?' If you've ever been asked these questions, aside from being ignorant and hurtful, you'll know it's beyond frustrating. The answer to the above questions, whilst it's complex and often confusing, can be given with two words: trauma bonded. If you find you're in a relationship that you know is so toxic that it's crushing your very being, but you can't bring yourself to leave, you may be in the clutches of a tight trauma bond. If you're constantly feeling on edge, forever working to appease your spouse to little avail and like you're constantly being chipped away at with their abusive behavior, then I can understand how emotionally shattering it feels to live this way. If in the same breath, it breaks your heart to even consider leaving them because you can't imagine life without them, then I can understand that feeling too; because I was trauma bonded to my abusive ex. From my own personal experience and from the experiences other survivors have opened up to me about, this book will cover the following: - What trauma bonding really is - The 7 stages that lead to you becoming trauma bonded - The parallels that Stockholm syndrome has with trauma bonding - The 5 stages you go through when you come to accept you're trauma bonded - The cognitive dissonance a trauma bond can cause - Breaking free from the traumatic bond This book will also include my own experiences and I'll draw upon those to help you really understand trauma bonding, and let you know that you're not alone in being shackled by this emotionally crippling bond. More importantly, this book will help you understand that the invisible chain that tethers you to your abuser can be broken.
Author: Patrick J. Carnes, PhD Publisher: HCI ISBN: 0757318231 Category : Family & Relationships Languages : en Pages : 338
Book Description
Some really great books just keep getting better! For seventeen years The Betrayal Bond has been the primary source for therapists and patients wrestling the effects of emotional pain and harm caused by exploitation from someone they trusted. Divorce, litigation, incest and child abuse, domestic violence, kidnapping, professional exploitation and religious abuse are all areas of trauma bonding. These are situations and relationships of incredible intensity or importance lend themselves more easily to an exploitation of trust or power. In The Betrayal Bond, Dr. Carnes presents an in-depth study of these relationships; why they form, who is most susceptible, and how they become so powerful. Dr. Carnes also gives a clear explanation of the bond that compels people to tolerate the intolerable, and for the first time, maps out the brain connection that makes being with hurtful people comparable to 'a drug of choice.' Most importantly, Carnes provides practical steps to identify compulsive attachment patterns and ultimately to change or end them for good. This new edition includes: New science for understanding how our brains can make a prison of bad relationships New assessments and insights based on 50,000 research participants A new section utilizing the latest findings in attachment research and narrative therapy to concretely rewrite and rescript bad experiences A redefinition of the factors contributing to addictive relationships
Author: Lawrence Swaim Publisher: John Hunt Publishing ISBN: 1780998775 Category : Social Science Languages : en Pages : 599
Book Description
If the world seems more violent these days, it's not your imagination—there's far too much aggression, coercion and deceit. And powerful institutions such as corporations and governments are getting better at hiding and rationalizing the harm they do. But it doesn't have to be that way: Trauma Bond: An Inquiry into the Nature of Evil shows how breaking free of the cycle of aggression and violence starts with you, and can start today. When aggression becomes evil, it turns into an extraordinarily dangerous and malignant force that threatens to destroy the planet. This fascinating book demonstrates at length how aggression and evil replicate themselves in the world, and how we can break free from the toxic cycle of psychological and physical violence. We can begin this process today, in order to make this world safer, both for ourselves and for our children.
Author: Lucy Bond Publisher: Routledge ISBN: 1134106610 Category : History Languages : en Pages : 196
Book Description
Trauma has become a catchword of our time and a central category in contemporary theory and criticism. In this illuminating and accessible volume, Lucy Bond and Stef Craps: provide an account of the history of the concept of trauma from the late nineteenth century to the present day examine debates around the term in their historical and cultural contexts trace the origins and growth of literary trauma theory introduce the reader to key thinkers in the field explore important issues and tensions in the study of trauma as a cultural phenomenon outline and assess recent critiques and revisions of cultural trauma research Trauma is an essential guide to a rich and vibrant area of literary and cultural inquiry.
Author: Franz Ruppert Publisher: ISBN: 9780955968303 Category : Affective disorders Languages : en Pages : 0
Book Description
Franz Ruppert's book explores the different types of trauma experience, along with the bonding theories of John Bowlby and attachment work of Mary Ainsworth and others, forming a multigenerational picture of the dynamics of trauma. Experiences of trauma can be so painful as to cause a split in the personality. It is impossible for a mother or father to avoid passing something of their own traumatic experiences on to their children through the process of bonding. These are the deeper feelings, perceptions, thoughts and embodied ways of being which form the residue of the trauma. Informed by his clinical experience Franz Ruppert introduces his insights into the origins of psychological distress. He has developed a unique way of working sensitively with Constellations to reveal and resolve the hidden dynamics of past trauma.
Author: Lawrence Swaim Publisher: John Hunt Publishing ISBN: 1785350218 Category : Social Science Languages : en Pages : 669
Book Description
Following on from the first two books in his 'Genesis Trilogy', Lawrence Swaim tells the amazing stories of people who broke the trauma bond, and created new lives for themselves. Including, among others: Norman Finkelstein (whose parents were both Holocaust survivors) who broke free from the inter-generational trauma in his family system by exposing extensive corruption in his community--and in American society--and by working for social justice in the Middle East; Eric Lomax, a former British soldier in the far east, who broke free from his haunting traumatic memories by meeting and reconciling with the Japanese man who had tortured him fifty years before, with the help of his brave and insightful wife; Gerry Adams who, together with his IRA and Sinn Fein comrades, broke free of the trauma of Northern Ireland's civil war, finally redeeming himself by questioning some of his own assumptions and then dedicating himself to achieving peace in the Good Friday (Peace) Agreement of 1998. This is a definitive book about personal struggle against traumatic memory, but also about how trauma bonding operates in society. It is the author's belief that unresolved feelings of psychological trauma are the wheelhouse of systemic evil, whether of the dictator, the demagogue or the criminal psychopath. It is by manipulating shared traumatic memories that tyrants control people, and get them to do terrible things they would never otherwise do.
Author: Beverly James Publisher: Simon and Schuster ISBN: 0029160057 Category : Attachment behavior Languages : en Pages : 312
Book Description
Provides a map, stories, and suggestions for those who are charged with the critical task of instilling a deep sense of trust and security in children so that they can begin to develop lasting normal relationships.
Author: Selma Evans Publisher: ISBN: Category : Family & Relationships Languages : en Pages : 185
Book Description
Do you often feel undeserving of love, insignificant and worthless? Do you struggle in your relationship but cannot imagine life without your partner? Deep down, do you know that you deserve better, but find it impossible to leave your partner? Does your partner frequently hurt you, then apologise, leaving you feeling overwhelmed and bewildered? The intricate and frequently puzzling response to these inquiries can be encapsulated in a simple phrase: Trauma Bonding. A prevalent instance is domestic abuse victims: a person might form a deep emotional connection with the abusive partner due to the recurring pattern of maltreatment and intervals of affection or regret. Do you often think about your relationship in these ways? "It is my fault — I make them angry." "She is under a lot of stress at work; she cannot help it. She will make it up to me later." "He is only like this because he loves me so much — you would not understand." "I will not leave him; he is my soulmate. You are just jealous." Trauma bonding with a narcissist can be draining for even the most mentally healthy individuals. But why does it happen? The bond forms from our basic human need for attachment as a survival mechanism. From there, abuse victims may become dependent on their abuser. Add in a cycle where the abuser repeatedly promises not to be abusive again and gains the victim's trust, and you have a complex emotional situation that affects even seemingly emotionally strong people. Trauma bonding is a nightmarish prison. Ending the relationship may cause the toxic bond to make you want to plead for your partner's return. This book specifically aims to help you: • Identify the dangerous stages of Trauma Bonding. • Understand when and why Trauma Bonding occurs (within families, friends, or peers). • Dissolve toxic bonds in romantic relationships. • Recognise factors that strengthen Trauma Bonds. • Utilise tools and exercises to break Trauma Bonds. • Develop a safe exit plan. • Heal from a Trauma Bond. Attachment and dependence can create a Trauma Bond, as can an ongoing pattern of abuse and remorse. This cycle can continue indefinitely if not interrupted. This book is designed with YOU in mind, allowing you to progress at your own pace. By following a step-by-step approach, this book will guide you out of the emotional trap that you are in by identifying typical behaviours of victims and their tormentors and applying techniques to break these patterns. If you have formed a traumatic bond with someone, there is no need to feel ashamed. Our brains naturally search for survival strategies. This manual will walk you through each step, helping you break free from the combination of abuse and positive reinforcement that keeps you trapped in guilt, anxiety, and emotional pain.
Author: Susan M. Johnson Publisher: Guilford Press ISBN: 1462504353 Category : Psychology Languages : en Pages : 244
Book Description
This book provides a theoretical framework and a practical model of intervention for distressed couples whose relationships are affected by the echoes of trauma. Combining attachment theory, trauma research, and emotionally focused therapeutic techniques, Susan M. Johnson guides the clinician in modifying the interactional patterns that maintain traumatic stress and fostering positive, healing relationships among survivors and their partners. In-depth case material brings to life the process of assessment and treatment with couples coping with the impact of different kinds of trauma, including childhood abuse, serious illness, and combat experiences. The concluding chapter features valuable advice on therapist self-care.
Author: Mark Wolynn Publisher: Penguin ISBN: 1101980370 Category : Psychology Languages : en Pages : 258
Book Description
A groundbreaking approach to transforming traumatic legacies passed down in families over generations, by an acclaimed expert in the field Depression. Anxiety. Chronic Pain. Phobias. Obsessive thoughts. The evidence is compelling: the roots of these difficulties may not reside in our immediate life experience or in chemical imbalances in our brains—but in the lives of our parents, grandparents, and even great-grandparents. The latest scientific research, now making headlines, supports what many have long intuited—that traumatic experience can be passed down through generations. It Didn’t Start with You builds on the work of leading experts in post-traumatic stress, including Mount Sinai School of Medicine neuroscientist Rachel Yehuda and psychiatrist Bessel van der Kolk, author of The Body Keeps the Score. Even if the person who suffered the original trauma has died, or the story has been forgotten or silenced, memory and feelings can live on. These emotional legacies are often hidden, encoded in everything from gene expression to everyday language, and they play a far greater role in our emotional and physical health than has ever before been understood. As a pioneer in the field of inherited family trauma, Mark Wolynn has worked with individuals and groups on a therapeutic level for over twenty years. It Didn’t Start with You offers a pragmatic and prescriptive guide to his method, the Core Language Approach. Diagnostic self-inventories provide a way to uncover the fears and anxieties conveyed through everyday words, behaviors, and physical symptoms. Techniques for developing a genogram or extended family tree create a map of experiences going back through the generations. And visualization, active imagination, and direct dialogue create pathways to reconnection, integration, and reclaiming life and health. It Didn’t Start With You is a transformative approach to resolving longstanding difficulties that in many cases, traditional therapy, drugs, or other interventions have not had the capacity to touch.
Author: Lauren Kozlowski
Author: Lauren Kozlowski
Author: Patrick J. Carnes, PhD
Author: Lawrence Swaim
Author: Lucy Bond
Author: Franz Ruppert
Author: Lawrence Swaim
Author: Beverly James
Author: Selma Evans
Author: Susan M. Johnson
Author: Mark Wolynn