How Not to Become a Crotchety Old Man PDF Download

Author: Mary McHugh
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 0740781553
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 146

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Book Description
Good things come in small sizes. That is so true, especially for How Not to Become a Crotchety Old Man. Big on fun and filled with hilarious insights about how not to let our inner crotchety old man out, this one makes the perfect Father's Day gift. Men will learn how to age gracefully so they never rattle off an inappropriate "dirty old man" joke. They'll learn that reading the obits first is a cardinal sin and that never reading the instructions is a close second.

Author: Mary McHugh
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 0740788655
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 145

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Book Description
You can be little. You can be old. You can be a lady. But you don’t have to be a little old lady! We’ve all seen her, hunched forward, her hair tucked neatly under a plastic rain bonnet. She’s clutching expired coupons, or discussing her latest health problems over lunch. She’s a little old lady . . . and she's coming your way at 2 mph. Little old ladies have elastic waistbands on all their slacks. They save rubber bands, remember fifteen-cent McDonald’s hamburgers, and have never seen a public rest room that was clean enough. How Not to Become a Little Old Lady is for any woman who is proud to have escaped little old ladyhood—or those in danger of slipping into it. Lighthearted and affectionately funny, it also includes charming illustrations from Adrienne Hartman.

Author: Ken Blanchard
Publisher: Berrett-Koehler Publishers
ISBN: 1626563357
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 141

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Book Description
Bring a renewed sense of purpose to the next chapter of your life with the New York Times bestselling author’s guide to thriving in retirement. Many people see their later years as a time to endure rather than as an exciting opportunity. Yet research and common sense confirm that people who embrace these years with energy and gusto consistently find them to be rich and rewarding. In Refire! Don't Retire, Ken Blanchard and Morton Shaevitz offer inspiring insight and thought-provoking questions to help people make the rest of their lives the best of their lives. In the trademark Ken Blanchard style, the authors tell the compelling story of Larry and Janice Sparks, who discover how to see each day as an opportunity to enhance their relationships, stimulate their minds, revitalize their bodies, and grow spiritually. As they learn to be open to new experiences, Larry and Janice rekindle passion in every area of their lives. Readers will find humor, practical information, and profound wisdom in Refire! Don't Retire. Best of all, they will be inspired to make all the years ahead truly worth living.

Author: Mary McHugh
Publisher: Willow Creek Press
ISBN: 1623435552
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 96

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Book Description
With this delightful, tongue-in-cheek guide for men who can win a case before the Supreme Court or run a conglomerate but can’t find the butter, Ms. McHugh provides a step-by-step guide for making breakfast, emptying the dishwasher, finding the clothes hamper and doing the laundry, along with an assortment of other domestic necessities. She continues with wise advice for men whose wives are pregnant—“How to Live with a Pregnant Wife Without Complaining about Anything While Making Her Feel Sexy and Desirable At All Times”, tells them how to go without sleep for three months after the baby is born, and finishes up with “How to Watch Football and the Baby at the Same Time.” A chapter on taking care of three small boys while staying sane should be on every young father’s emergency list for times when his wife is out of town on business or visiting her mother in Iowa. And finally, instructions on answering a ringing telephone, folding shirts for a business trip and finding his wallet, keys, glasses, socks and underwear are absolute must-reads for every man who thinks some invisible being does all those things. Aimed at busy women of all ages, this book will also make grown men laugh and might even be useful when they run out of underwear.

Author: Marilynn Carlson Webber
Publisher: Zondervan Publishing Company
ISBN: 9780310207160
Category : Women
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
With practicality and humor, these anecdotes show how choices we make in our 30s and 40s determine who we will become as we grow older--and how making right choices helps us develop positive traits including courage to face change, growth in grace, and contentment.

Author: Mary McHugh
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 9780740747083
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 150

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Book Description
Men may be from Mars and women from Venus, but the alien known as teenager comes from a place way beyond those two. What else would account for that incredible transformation from loving child to the hostile creature who wants zilch to do with dear old Mom and Dad? How to Ruin Your Children's Lives is a survival manual for enduring this transmutation and-with a little luck-maintaining enough sanity to one day hear those longed-for words, Hey, I guess you weren't so stupid after all.Purple hair? Belly rings? Bizarre musical tastes? Not a problem as long as readers have How to Ruin Your Children's Lives' nearly 300 tips and tactics close at hand. With resident teenagers slamming doors and screaming at the top of their lungs, Mom! You're ruining my life! parents should at least make certain they're handling the job with aplomb.Consider these tips: o Call them at their friend's house to ask if they want lasagna for dinner.o Ask them about girlfriends (or boyfriends) in front of relatives.o Tell them about the time you streaked when you were in college.o Sing old Beatles songs when their friends are in the car.o Dress like Christina Aguilera.Author Mary McHugh is right on target. She shows parents how to match attitude with attitude and how to carry on whether the teen-parent subject is sex, using the family car, grades, or curfews. This book's perfect for any parent in the trenches and for empty nesters trying to stem their tears.

Author: Daniel Friedman
Publisher: Minotaur Books
ISBN: 1250027578
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 288

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Book Description
DON'T EVER GET OLD was one of mystery-publishing's biggest critical successes last year, earning starred reviews from every major trade publication, garnering nominations for the Edgar, Thriller, and Anthony awards, and winning the Macavity Award for Best First Novel. The producer of four Harry Potter films and the Sherlock Holmes sequel, Lionel Wigram, is set to produce the film version. In Daniel Friedman's new novel, set in Memphis, Tennessee, and four months after the events of DON'T EVER GET OLD, eighty-eight-year-old Buck Schatz is reluctantly coming to terms with the fact that he can only move around with the aid of a walker, and his dementia seems to be getting worse. So when one of Buck's long-time foes, a bank-robber named Elijah, comes to Buck looking for protection from mysterious pursuers, Buck wavers. In the end, his desire to cement his legacy by closing out a series of long-unsolved robberies overwhelms his usual antipathy toward doing favors for people he dislikes. Buck agrees to broker Elijah's surrender to the authorities, if Elijah will promise to confess to his long-ago crimes. But nothing involving Elijah, or Buck, is ever simple, and Elijah's plans for Buck are more sinister than they first appeared. Written in Buck's signature voice and featuring a mystery that will knock your socks off, DON'T EVER LOOK BACK takes a decades-old feud between two dangerous—and now elderly—men and brings it to a final, explosive conclusion.

Author: Nathan Hale
Publisher: Abrams
ISBN: 1683350707
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 128

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Book Description
The aliens have arrived. And they’re hungry for electricity. In the Earth of the future, humans are on the run from an alien force—giant blobs who suck up electrical devices wherever they can find them. Strata and her family are part of a caravan of digital rescuers, hoping to keep the memory of civilization alive by saving electronics wherever they can. Many humans have reverted to a pre-electrical age, and others have taken advantage of the invasion to become dangerous bandits and outlaws. When Strata and her brother are separated from the caravan, they must rely on a particularly beautiful and rare robot pony to escape the outlaws and aliens—and defeat the invaders once and for all.

Author: Eric Garcia
Publisher: Villard
ISBN: 1588364003
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 352

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Book Description
Vincent Rubio, the most hard-boiled reptile detective ever, is back on the case in the third installment of Eric Garcia’s cult mystery series about dinosaurs who are still alive and committing crimes in L.A. Rubio’s latest assignment: the dinosaur mafia. As fans of Anonymous Rex and Casual Rex already know, the dinosaurs faked their extinction and live among us, disguising themselves as humans in elaborately designed latex costumes. Anyone could be a dinosaur. Your podiatrist. The crotchety old man who lives next door. Julia Roberts, it is well known, is actually a Stegosaur. When the head of the Raptor mafia asks Vincent Rubio to perform a service, he has no choice but to head for Miami to investigate a team of Hadrosaurs who are muscling in on Raptor territory. It’s dangerous business. Make the wrong move and your tail gets chopped off. Eric Garcia’s third Rex novel is a wildly entertaining mystery and an instant classic of dinosaur mafia fiction—further proof that this gifted author really knows where the bones are buried.

Author: Mary McHugh
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 1452104468
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 99

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Book Description
This mischievously funny and charmingly illustrated volume celebrates grandmothers who love to spoil their grandchildren rotten! Every grandmother knows that having grandchildren is one of the greatest pleasures in life. When your children finally get around to having their own children, you get a beautiful new baby in your life—and best of all, you’re not responsible for how this one turns out! Now comes the dilemma. Should you be a Good Granny who gives the little cherub healthy food and educational toys? Or should you be a Bad Granny, indulging your grandkid in Kentucky Fried Chicken, video game marathons and trips to the racetrack? In Good Granny/Bad Granny, Mqry McHugh explores both sides in a hilarious series of examples, all delightfully illustrated by Patricia Storms.